time out

i've just come back from some time out from all things esperance. some time spent with a wise woman who has helped me feel that i may just be able to manage the opportunities and limits that this farm wife life presents. she sent me home with a rooster in the back of the car - fortunately it was silent for the whole trip, or it would have been a long 7 hours.
the rooster is alive and well, which is lucky - as there have been other deaths while i've been away. one calf, and half my vege patch. the sheep were left to roam the house block, which includes my carefully tended vegetables. unfortunately a lamb got its head stuck in the makeshift fence around the veges and pulled it down. you can see how that story ends. lulu is the only calf left and going strong - think we're over the most tricky time for that pet hopefully.
i don't think i'm at the stage where i can healthily philosophize about farm life yet. hoping my resilience to challenges improves in the near future. this covers everything from seeing your farmer 15 minutes in 24 hours, to being told your hand fed pet has gone to "calfie heaven"...

wish list

birthdays and christmas remind of how my life has changed recently...my wishlist has gone from cds, clothes and funky trinkets to a sharp spade, a kaffir lime tree, a finished vege retic situation and maybe some more sheep manure. and some new gardening gloves. although i asked tim for a cd...bring on the 30th.

it's raining!

We got 10mm of rain yesterday - enough to make everyone smile. Except my calf Lulu who doesn't think it is funny at all. Have been reflecting with some friends on the time it takes to increase your self sufficiency. There is no way I could work full time and be self sufficient - the vege patch is basic at best and to improve our productivity I will have to work hard to develop some fruit and other yet to be determined things. No other deep and meaningfuls at the moment - life is just ticking along.

dead stuff

It still hasn't rained yet. So not much to blog about really in that regard. Today a whole heap of sheep walked into the dam behind our house for water except the dam is empty. And they got stuck and died. There is a distinct smell of rotting that is in the whole house - yuk. I am going to town tomorrow so will be good to get away from the smell and the disheartening emotions it provokes.
I got two more calves last week but one died after having muscle tremors and falling over a lot. So I have one more feisty calf who is still in the chookpen calming down - I keep telling her there is such a thing as peaceful coexistence.
Tim and I kayaked across the Esperance bay on the weekend and it was great to do something like that together. Inspired to do more and develop my upper body definition...Tim working at night a bit at the moment so generally desperate and dateless at present - spending a lot of time trawling free sewing pattern sites on the internet is keeping me entertained.

the psychology of rain

didn't really believe in this...but, here we are. we have had zero rain. and everyone is starting to get stressed and grumpy. i read somewhere recently that australians have recently changed how they feel about rain, given the drought. where we used to get annoyed at the inconvenience, now we enjoy it. it is so dry here and the animals are running out of food and water. we have lost quite a few lambing ewes because of it. i have found myself praying for rain - it is getting pretty desperate. although i also have been thinking about the people over east who have gone 5 years without rain. hopefully we get a break sometime soon.